Sometimes I consider myself a patient person, other times, not at all. When I'm waiting for something that I really want, it can be hard to wait with a good attitude. Marriage and having a family would definitely rank as things I want as well as am looking forward to with all my heart. However, no husband or even potentials yet. I question God at times, wondering why He hasn't "seen fit" to bring my man into my life yet. I get frustrated and discouraged occasionally.
Lately though, I've been feeling that I need to focus on and be thankful for what I do have rather than what I do not. I do have family and friends that love me, a great job, a nice place to live, and opportunities to minister to others in ways that maybe I wouldn't be able to if I was married already. I am in a unique season of opportunity and growth and I plan on taking full advantage of it.
In regards to timing, yes, I would like to meet my future husband sooner rather than later. One thing that struck me today though was that I have done a lot of growing and working through baggage the last few years. If I had been married already, it would have been more difficult to work through those issues while directly affecting someone else that I was spending my life with. I also wouldn't be writing this blog.
If remaining single longer means that my husband and I have the chance to grow up more, becoming the fullness that God has called us to be, as well as having unique ministry opportunities, then I am grateful for this time of singleness. I was reading through someone's testimony of how, when she was only 15, she purposed to put aside the next five years to focus solely on God and not be distracted by guys. After that period of time, she met her husband. My first thought was, maybe I could give it until my next birthday which is in March as I didn't even want to wait a whole year. After thinking it through some more, I realized that I would rather have to wait another year or two, even longer, if that would bring the most glory to God.
The passing of time can be exciting as it draws us closer to hoped for fulfillments of dreams, but it can also be depressing as that much more time has gone by without the realization of those same dreams. It's all a matter of perspective. Although I know there will still be times that I struggle with being single, I choose to focus on the good that comes from this time and not try to rush God because I'm impatient.
I will continue praying for my husband as well as praying that any obstacles in the way of us being together be torn down through the power of Jesus' name. I will also be choosing to thank God for the blessings He has placed in my life, even if they aren't the ones that I wish I had. There is value in every moment of every day. I look forward to enjoying those moments, both as a single woman, and eventually, as a wife and mother.